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PSY 0320-01 Sex and Relationships Spring 2021
- My Courses
- Spring 2021
- Assignment #1: The 36 Questions Write-Up - due Wednesday, February 17, 2021
- The 36 Questions Write-Up - due Wednesday, Feb. 17, 2020, click here to upload.
The 36 Questions Write-Up - due Wednesday, Feb. 17, 2020, click here to upload.
Part 1: Conduct the Interview
· Review all 36 questions and select at least 18 to use for your interview.
· Select a person from your life to participate in this conversation.
· The exercise requires both you & your interviewee to answer the same questions.
· Plan to spend at least 1 hour on this conversation.
· Use phone or video-conferencing for the conversation rather than email/text.
· You don’t have to record the interview but should take some notes.
· You do not need to submit a transcript of the interview itself. The assignment is an analysis of the process & your feelings about this intimate conversation.
Part 2: Fill in the Write-Up Rubric Form
· Download the rubric below and type in your answers, in full sentences, directly onto the document.
· Save the completed document as a Word doc or PDF file under your name & “36 questions write-up” and upload it on the iLearn assignment link.
PSY/SXS 320- Sex & Relationships: Spring 2021
The 36 Questions Write-Up
Part 1: Conduct the Interview
- Review all 36 questions and select at least 18 to use for your interview.
- The exercise requires both you & your interviewee to answer the same questions.
- Plan to spend at least 1 hour on this conversation.
- Use phone or video-conferencing for the conversation rather than email/text.
- You don’t have to record the interview but should take some notes.
- You do not need to submit a transcript of the interview itself. The assignment is an analysis of the process & your feelings about this intimate conversation.
Part 2: Fill out this Form & Answer The Questions about “The Questions”:
Address each of the 9 questions below completely, using full sentences.
· Type your answer in the space after each question.
· The “# of sentences” guideline for each question is the minimum you need to write & you are welcome to write more!
- Save the completed document as a Word doc or PDF file under your name & “36 questions write-up” and upload it on the iLearn assignment link.
- What is the relationship you have to your interviewee? You don’t have to identify the person by name. (1 pt.)
- How would you describe your relationship or level of intimacy with this person before the interview? (1 pt.) * 1-2 sentences
- How has the pandemic affected communication with this person over the last year? (1 pt.) * 1-2 sentences
- Why did you select this person to interview for this assignment? (1 pt.) * 1-2 sentences
- Which question generated the most surprising answer, and why did it surprise you?
(2 pts). * 3-4 sentences
- Which question caused you to feel most vulnerable when you were sharing your answer & why? (2 pts). * 3-4 sentences
- At the end of the interview, ask your person how they felt (emotions) during the conversation and how they felt about you selecting them for this exercise. Write their answer here (you can quote them): (2 pts). * 3-4 sentences
- How do you think this exercise affected your relationship with this person?
(2 pts). * 2-3 sentences
- Based on your experience with the 36 Questions, do you feel that this is a useful tool to increase intimacy and can it “lead to love”, as it claims? Why or why not?
(2 pts). * 2-3 sentences
Ivy Chen, MPH
The 36 Questions
In Mandy Len Catron’s Modern Love essay, “To Fall in Love With Anyone, Do This,” she refers to a study by the psychologist Arthur Aron (and others) that explores whether intimacy between two strangers can be accelerated by having them ask each other a specific series of personal questions. The 36 questions in the study are broken up into three sets, with each set intended to be more probing than the previous one.
The idea is that mutual vulnerability fosters closeness. To quote the study’s authors, “One key pattern associated with the development of a close relationship among peers is sustained, escalating, reciprocal, personal self-disclosure.” Allowing oneself to be vulnerable with another person can be exceedingly difficult, so this exercise provides an opportunity and a tool to open up.
1. Given the choice of anyone in the world, whom would you want as a dinner guest?
2. Would you like to be famous? In what way?
3. Before making a telephone call, do you ever rehearse what you are going to say? Why?
4. What would constitute a “perfect” day for you?
5. When did you last sing to yourself? To someone else?
6. If you were able to live to the age of 90 and retain either the mind or body of a 30-year-old for the last 60 years of your life, which would you want?
7. Do you have a secret hunch about how you will die?
8. Name three things you and your partner appear to have in common.
9. For what in your life do you feel most grateful?
10. If you could change anything about the way you were raised, what would it be?
11. Take four minutes and tell your partner your life story in as much detail as possible.
12. If you could wake up tomorrow having gained any one quality or ability, what would it be?
13. If a crystal ball could tell you the truth about yourself, your life, the future or anything else, what would you want to know?
14. Is there something that you’ve dreamed of doing for a long time? Why haven’t you done it?
15. What is the greatest accomplishment of your life?
16. What do you value most in a friendship?
17. What is your most treasured memory?
18. What is your most terrible memory?
19. If you knew that in one year you would die suddenly, would you change anything about the way you are now living? Why?
20. What does friendship mean to you?
21. What roles do love and affection play in your life?
22. Alternate sharing something you consider a positive characteristic of your partner. Share a total of five items.
23. How close and warm is your family? Do you feel your childhood was happier than most other people’s?
24. How do you feel about your relationship with your mother?
25. Make three true “we” statements each. For instance, “We are both in this room feeling ... “
26. Complete this sentence: “I wish I had someone with whom I could share ... “
27. If you were going to become a close friend with your partner, please share what would be important for him or her to know.
28. Tell your partner what you like about them; be very honest this time, saying things that you might not say to someone you’ve just met.
29. Share with your partner an embarrassing moment in your life.
30. When did you last cry in front of another person? By yourself?
31. Tell your partner something that you like about them already.
32. What, if anything, is too serious to be joked about?
33. If you were to die this evening with no opportunity to communicate with anyone, what would you most regret not having told someone? Why haven’t you told them yet?
34. Your house, containing everything you own, catches fire. After saving your loved ones and pets, you have time to safely make a final dash to save any one item. What would it be? Why?
35. Of all the people in your family, whose death would you find most disturbing? Why?
36. Share a personal problem and ask your partner’s advice on how he or she might handle it. Also, ask your partner to reflect back to you how you seem to be feeling about the problem you have chosen.